How Do I Move Past My Wife’s Emotional Affair?

Infidelity in a marriage can be devastating, whether it is physical or emotional. Emotional affairs involve intimate connections with someone other than one’s spouse that are typically kept secret from the partner. The betrayal of trust and the feelings of hurt, anger, and confusion can be overwhelming for both parties involved.

Moving past an emotional affair can be a challenging process that requires patience, communication, and commitment. In order to move past an emotional affair, it is important to understand the root causes of why it occurred. It may stem from unresolved issues within the relationship such as lack of intimacy or communication breakdowns. Alternatively, external factors such as stress at work or changes in personal circumstances could lead to seeking emotional connection elsewhere.

Regardless of the cause, healing cannot begin until both individuals have acknowledged their role in what happened and take steps towards rebuilding trust and repairing the relationship. In this article, we will explore strategies on how to move forward after an emotional affair has taken place in a marriage.

Acknowledge The Pain And Hurt

When faced with a spouse’s emotional affair, it is natural to feel pain and hurt. It can be challenging to understand and cope with these emotions, but acknowledging them is an essential first step towards healing.

Acknowledging your feelings requires honest communication – both with yourself and with your spouse. Be open about how their actions have affected you emotionally.

Expressing your pain can help release some of the negative emotions that may be bottling up inside you. Unaddressed pain can fester over time, causing resentment and further damage to the relationship. Communication helps create clarity around what has occurred in the relationship and provides space for expression of emotion without judgment or blame.

It is also important to use this experience as an opportunity for growth. While painful, infidelity offers an opportunity for personal and relational development when addressed appropriately. This event allows couples to identify weaknesses in their marriage while encouraging them to work together towards strengthening their bond.

Healing from an emotional affair takes time, patience, understanding, and effort from both partners involved. Couples who navigate through this difficult period often emerge stronger than before – not just as individuals but also as a couple.

By taking ownership of your part in the relationship struggles leading up to the affair, you allow room for positive growth opportunities.

Processing emotions following such traumatic events takes time; however, it is crucial not only for moving on but also for preventing future issues within the relationship.

The next section will discuss ways to take necessary steps toward processing emotions effectively without overwhelming oneself by using practical strategies designed specifically for couples struggling after experiencing infidelity.

Take Time To Process Your Emotions

One can liken the aftermath of an emotional affair to a storm. Just like how storms bring about destruction and chaos, the discovery of a spouse’s emotional infidelity can leave one feeling overwhelmed with negative emotions such as anger, betrayal, and confusion. The road to healing from this traumatic experience is not easy but it is possible.

One important step in moving past your wife’s emotional affair is taking time to process your emotions. Finding support during this trying period is crucial. This could be through therapy or talking to trusted family members and friends who will provide you with a listening ear without judgment.

It’s essential to remember that healing takes time, so try not to rush yourself into getting over the pain quickly. Allow yourself ample space and time for reflection on what has happened while keeping in mind that everyone heals at their own pace.

Seeking closure after discovering an emotional affair may mean different things for different people. Some individuals might take the route of confronting their partners head-on while others might opt for some form of separation before making any decisions about staying together or apart. Whatever path you choose, it’s vital that you make informed decisions based on your situation rather than relying solely on impulse.

Understanding the nature of emotional affairs can also help you move forward from this painful experience. Recognizing its characteristics enables you to know what signs to look out for in the future and guard against them effectively.

In conclusion, recovering from an emotional affair requires patience, understanding, and self-care strategies aimed at promoting mental health wellness.

Understand The Nature Of Emotional Affairs

Understanding emotional infidelity is crucial to moving past your wife’s affair.

Emotional affairs are a type of affair where one partner engages in an intimate relationship with another person outside their marriage, without physical contact. Unlike physical affairs, emotional infidelity involves emotional intimacy and deep feelings that can be as hurtful as sexual infidelity.

Signs of emotional affairs in marriage include secrecy, defensiveness about the new friend, withdrawal from previous social activities or friends, and significant changes in behavior patterns towards the spouse.

The most apparent sign could be when your partner becomes emotionally distant or starts picking fights frequently. It may result in you feeling neglected or unimportant to them; this could lead to resentment on both sides.

Understanding the nature of emotional affairs helps you identify it early enough before it causes more damage to your relationship. You need first to recognize its signs so that you can take appropriate action.

This includes talking openly with your partner about what they have been doing and how it has affected you emotionally. It would help if you also considered getting professional counseling for yourself or for both of you together.

Addressing the root causes of the affair should be your next step after understanding the nature of emotional infidelity and identifying its signs. This will involve exploring why it happened in the first place and finding ways to prevent future occurrences.

In some cases, marital issues such as communication problems or lack of intimacy could contribute significantly to an emotional affair. Working on these underlying issues through couples therapy can help rebuild trust and strengthen your relationship going forward.

Address The Root Causes Of The Affair

Identifying triggers that led to the emotional affair is crucial in moving past it. It may involve examining both partners’ behavior and emotions leading up to the event. Understanding what triggered the infidelity can help prevent similar situations from occurring in the future. Identifying these triggers also allows couples to work together on developing new communication strategies, which will strengthen their relationship.

Seeking closure after an emotional affair involves addressing any unresolved feelings or issues between partners. This may entail disclosing some of those difficult-to-talk-about things that caused pain and hurt during the unfaithful period. Both individuals must be willing to listen actively and communicate honestly without judgment or blame, so they can begin rebuilding trust and intimacy.

It’s important for couples who have gone through an emotional affair to focus on rebuilding trust through communication rather than solely relying on apologies or promises not to repeat past behaviors. Effective communication requires active listening skills, empathy, honesty, and mutual respect. Couples should also consider seeking professional counseling if necessary, as a neutral third party can provide valuable guidance during this process.

By identifying triggers that led to the emotional affair, seeking closure, and focusing on rebuilding trust through open communication channels with each other, couples can move forward positively into a happier future together. In doing so, they’ll gain deeper insights into themselves while experiencing greater levels of connection with one another – all essential components of long-term happiness within committed relationships.

Rebuild Trust Through Communication

  1. Expressing feelings can play an important role in rebuilding trust from a breach of an emotional affair.

  2. Listening skills, such as actively listening and allowing space for a partner to share their feelings, can create an environment of openness and security.

  3. Acknowledging and respecting the feelings of both parties, while avoiding criticism or judgment, can help to foster a safe and trusting communication.

  4. Utilizing empathy to understand and validate the emotions of one another can help to restore a sense of intimacy and connection.

Expressing Feelings

Trust is a fundamental aspect of any relationship, and when it’s broken, it can be challenging to rebuild. When a spouse has an emotional affair, the pain and hurt that follows can be overwhelming. One way to begin moving past this betrayal is by expressing your feelings.

Journaling can provide an outlet for individuals who are struggling with their emotions after discovering their partner’s infidelity. Writing down your thoughts and feelings in a journal provides a private space where you can process what happened without fear of judgment or criticism from others.

Tips for journaling include setting aside time each day to write, not censoring yourself as you put pen to paper, and reflecting on how you feel after writing.

Seeking support from friends and family members can also help individuals move forward from their spouse’s emotional affair. Trusted loved ones can offer comfort and encouragement as well as practical advice on navigating the challenges ahead. It’s important to choose people who will listen without judgment and respect your boundaries regarding what information you’re comfortable sharing about the situation.

Expressing your feelings honestly but respectfully with your spouse is another crucial step towards rebuilding trust through communication. Acknowledging how their actions impacted you emotionally allows them to understand the severity of what they did while giving both parties the opportunity to work together towards healing the relationship.

In summary, finding healthy ways to express one’s emotions following a spouse’s emotional affair is essential for beginning the healing process. Journaling offers an outlet for processing complex emotions privately; seeking support from trusted loved ones brings comfort during difficult times; finally communicating openly with one’s spouse helps foster understanding between partners so they may build trust again over time.

Listening Skills

Rebuilding trust after a spouse’s emotional affair is not an easy task. It requires both parties to communicate openly, listen actively and work towards a common goal of healing the relationship.

Listening skills form an essential aspect of effective communication because they help in understanding each other’s perspectives without judgment or criticism. Active listening techniques such as paraphrasing, summarizing and reflecting feelings can go a long way in establishing mutual respect and empathy.

Non-verbal communication cues also play a significant role in rebuilding trust through communication. Actions speak louder than words, and it is imperative for partners to pay attention to their body language while communicating with each other. Focusing on nonverbal cues like eye contact, facial expressions, tone of voice and posture can help convey sincerity and build rapport between partners.

Effective listening skills coupled with nonverbal communication cues foster healthy conversations that strengthen relationships over time. By demonstrating genuine interest in what your partner has to say, you create a safe space where they feel heard and understood. This type of open dialogue builds trust by allowing each person to express themselves freely without fear of being judged or misunderstood.

In conclusion, rebuilding trust through communication involves active listening techniques along with paying attention to nonverbal communication cues. Effective listening enables individuals to understand their partner’s perspective whilst conveying empathy; meanwhile, nonverbal cues demonstrate sincerity which helps establish common ground for better understanding between partners. With patience and commitment from both parties, it is possible to rebuild trust following a spouse’s emotional affair.

Establish Boundaries And Expectations

Establishing boundaries and managing expectations are crucial steps in moving past a spouse’s emotional affair. This involves setting clear guidelines for behavior that both partners must follow to rebuild trust and strengthen the relationship.

One important boundary is establishing open communication channels between spouses. Both parties should feel comfortable discussing their feelings, thoughts, and concerns about the affair without judgment or retaliation. This can help prevent future misunderstandings and promote mutual understanding.

Another essential boundary is creating space for individual growth and self-care. Each partner should have time and energy to pursue personal interests, hobbies, or activities outside of the marriage. This helps foster a sense of independence, self-worth, and confidence that can benefit the relationship as well.

Managing expectations also plays a key role in healing after an emotional affair. It involves being realistic about what each partner can offer emotionally, mentally, physically, or financially at this stage of the recovery process. Setting achievable goals and celebrating small victories along the way can create momentum towards long-term success.

  • Establishing regular date nights can help couples reconnect on a deeper level
  • Creating a shared vision board or goal list can inspire joint efforts towards common aspirations
  • Practicing forgiveness exercises such as writing letters expressing gratitude or apology can release negative emotions and promote empathy.
  • Seeking support from trusted friends or family members who have experience with similar situations can provide valuable insights and encouragement.

In summary, establishing firm boundaries around communication and individual growth while managing realistic expectations together will aid you in recovering from your wife’s emotional affair. Additionally incorporating supportive practices into your daily routine may further assist in mending those broken bonds within your marriage.

If these methods prove ineffective then seeking professional help may be necessary to move forward positively as individuals through therapy sessions tailored specifically to address issues associated with infidelity recovery.

Seek Professional Help

Establishing boundaries and expectations is the first step in moving past a partner’s emotional affair. However, it may not be enough to heal completely from the betrayal of trust. It is important to recognize that seeking professional help can provide therapy benefits that will aid in your healing journey.

For example, imagine a situation where a couple has been married for 10 years when one partner discovers their spouse has had an emotional affair with a coworker. Although they establish boundaries and expectations for rebuilding trust, communication remains difficult and feelings of hurt linger.

Seeking out couples therapy allows them to work through these emotions in a safe space while gaining tools and techniques to continue healing outside of sessions.

When finding the right therapist, consider their qualifications and experience in dealing with infidelity issues specifically. A licensed marriage counselor or certified sex addiction therapist could be helpful resources. It is also important to find someone who you feel comfortable opening up to as vulnerability plays a crucial role in effective therapy.

In conclusion, navigating the aftermath of an emotional affair can be challenging but seeking professional help can bring great benefits. Finding the right therapist who specializes in relationship counseling can help you process complex emotions while providing guidance on how best to move forward towards forgiveness which we’ll explore next.

Practice Forgiveness

Dealing with a partner’s emotional affair is challenging, and forgiveness may seem impossible. However, forgiving your spouse can be liberating for both of you. It requires mindful reflection on your emotions and an understanding of the situation to move past it.

One way to practice forgiveness is through active listening. This means giving your wife a chance to explain her actions without judgment or interruption. Listen carefully to what she says, trying to understand why she did what she did. While this might feel uncomfortable, it is essential in rebuilding trust between partners.

Another crucial aspect of practicing forgiveness is acknowledging your feelings about the betrayal. You need to allow yourself time and space to process how hurtful the experience has been for you emotionally. Mindful reflection allows you to observe these feelings non-judgmentally without holding onto resentment towards your partner.

Lastly, while focusing on the present and future after experiencing such trauma seems difficult, it could help mend things between partners more quickly than constantly dwelling on the past. Remembering that no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes at some point will assist in making peace with yourself and moving forward together as a couple.

In conclusion, practicing forgiveness involves:

  • Active listening, giving your partner a chance to explain their actions without judgment or interruption.
  • Acknowledging your feelings about the betrayal and allowing yourself time and space to process how hurtful the experience has been for you emotionally.
  • Mindful reflection, observing your feelings non-judgmentally without holding onto resentment towards your partner.
  • Focusing on the present and future, instead of dwelling on the past and remembering that no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes at some point.

These steps will help you move past the emotional affair and rebuild trust with your partner for a better future together as a couple.

Focus On The Present And Future

Moving forward after discovering your wife’s emotional affair can be a challenging journey. It is normal to feel angry, hurt, and betrayed by someone you thought was trustworthy. However, it is crucial to focus on the present and future rather than dwelling on past events that cannot be changed.

By shifting your perspective towards personal growth and healing, you will empower yourself to overcome this difficult period. Letting go of negative emotions associated with an emotional affair requires patience and self-compassion. Understand that healing takes time and effort; therefore, do not rush the process or judge yourself harshly for how long it takes to move forward fully.

Seek support from trusted friends or family members who may provide comfort during times of distress. Developing strategies for focusing on the present moment is also essential in moving beyond past hurts. Engage in activities that bring joy and fulfillment into your life, such as hobbies or interests which make you happy.

Mindfulness meditation techniques help reduce stress levels while promoting mental clarity and relaxation. In conclusion, releasing pain from an emotional affair entails redirecting energy towards positive change instead of becoming stuck in past heartbreaks. Moving forward involves letting go of resentment or anger harbored towards one another but still taking responsibility where appropriate.

In the next section about avoiding blaming and shaming others involved in the relationship dynamic, we’ll discuss ways to prevent further damage to yourself or those around you during recovery efforts.

Avoid Blaming And Shaming

Blaming and shaming your partner after discovering an emotional affair can be a natural response. However, it is important to avoid these negative emotions as they will only make the situation worse. Blaming your partner for their actions may lead them to feel criticized and defensive while shaming them could damage their self-esteem further.

Instead of blaming or shaming, focus on rebuilding intimacy with your spouse. Start by having open communication about what led to the emotional affair and how you both can work together to prevent future occurrences. This will help establish trust in your relationship again and create a stronger bond between you two.

Avoiding resentment is also crucial when moving past an emotional affair. Resentment toward your partner could cause long-term damage to your relationship if not addressed promptly. Instead of holding onto anger, try practicing forgiveness and understanding towards your spouse’s actions. It may take time but letting go of resentment can help pave the way for healing and growth in the relationship.

In conclusion, avoiding blame and shame, rebuilding intimacy, and preventing resentment are key factors in moving past an emotional affair with your spouse. By focusing on these aspects, you can begin repairing the broken trust that occurred during the emotional affair.

Take responsibility for your own actions is another step that should be taken seriously towards achieving full recovery from this type of marital crisis.

Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions

Avoiding blame and shaming is crucial when dealing with emotional infidelity in a relationship. However, it’s equally important for the affected partner to take responsibility for their own actions as they move forward. Self-reflection is an essential step towards healing from this kind of betrayal.

One way to start self-reflection is by examining your role in the relationship prior to the affair. Were there any underlying issues that may have contributed to your spouse seeking emotional fulfillment elsewhere?

It’s also helpful to consider if you had any behaviors or patterns that may have pushed your partner away emotionally.

Once you’ve identified areas where you could improve, focus on accountability and personal growth. This can include therapy or counseling sessions, reading books on healthy communication and relationships, or even participating in couples’ workshops together.

By investing time and effort into improving yourself, you not only become a better partner but also create a healthier environment for your relationship to thrive.

Investing in self-care and personal growth can be difficult after experiencing such deep hurt and betrayal. However, focusing on these areas can lead to long-term benefits both personally and within the relationship. Remember that healing takes time, patience, and consistent effort towards positive change.

With dedication and determination towards personal growth, individuals can find hope for a brighter future beyond their current pain.

Invest In Self-Care And Personal Growth

Dealing with your wife’s emotional affair can be emotionally draining, but it is important to take care of yourself. One way to do this is through self-reflection and self-discovery. Take some time to reflect on what you need in a relationship and what makes you happy. This might involve going to therapy or talking to a trusted friend.

Pursuing hobbies and interests is another way to invest in self-care and personal growth. Engaging in activities that bring you joy can help distract from negative thoughts and emotions, while also giving you a sense of accomplishment. Consider taking up a new hobby or revisiting an old one that you haven’t had the chance to enjoy lately.

Self-care isn’t just about doing things for yourself; it’s also about setting boundaries and prioritizing your own needs. Make sure you are communicating your feelings clearly with your spouse, while also recognizing when you need space or alone time.

By taking care of yourself first, you will be better equipped to handle any challenges that may arise in your relationship moving forward.


Investing in self-care and personal growth can provide a solid foundation for rebuilding trust and intimacy within your marriage. In the next section, we will explore ways to rekindle the spark between you and your partner without neglecting the importance of individual growth.

Rekindle Intimacy In Your Relationship

Investing in self-care and personal growth can be an effective way to move past your wife’s emotional affair. Taking care of yourself mentally, physically, and emotionally is essential for healing from the pain caused by a partner’s infidelity. When you prioritize your own well-being, it helps you regain control over your life and rebuild confidence.

Rekindling romance after an emotional affair requires rebuilding connection with your partner. It involves taking time to reflect on what led to the betrayal and developing healthy communication skills that foster trust and forgiveness. Rebuilding intimacy may take some effort, but it is a crucial step towards healing both individually and as a couple.

One way to rekindle intimacy is by exploring new ways to connect with each other. This could involve trying out different activities together or finding common interests that bring you closer. Additionally, practicing active listening skills allows partners to communicate their feelings effectively without judgment, which can help build understanding between them.

Redefining relationship goals should also be considered when moving forward after an emotional affair. Both partners need to have clear expectations about what they want from their relationship moving forward. Setting realistic boundaries, being honest with each other about needs and desires, and committing to working through challenges are all critical components of rebuilding a strong foundation for your future together.

By focusing on these steps toward redefining your relationship goals, you can begin to heal from the hurt caused by an emotional affair while building stronger connections with your partner. However, there are other significant steps that you must consider when creating new goals for your partnership post-affair.

Redefine Your Relationship Goals

Creating boundaries and setting expectations is an essential step in moving past your wife’s emotional affair. It is crucial to communicate openly with each other about what you are comfortable with, such as how much contact she has with the person involved in the affair, and anything else that makes you feel uneasy. Establishing clear boundaries can help rebuild trust and create a sense of safety in your relationship.

Reevaluating priorities means taking a closer look at what matters most to you both individually and together as a couple. This may include identifying areas where you want to improve or grow, such as spending more quality time together, exploring new hobbies or interests, or focusing on personal development goals. By working towards these shared objectives, you can strengthen your bond and deepen your connection with each other.

Establishing new goals for your relationship beyond just ‘moving past’ the affair is critical for long-term success. These could be anything from planning a romantic getaway or starting a joint project together, to making time for regular check-ins to assess progress and work through any remaining issues. Having something positive to focus on will keep you motivated and remind you of why you chose to stay committed to each other in the first place.

As you move forward, remember to celebrate your progress and successes along the way. Reflecting on how far you’ve come since discovering the emotional affair can give you hope for the future and reinforce your commitment to one another. Don’t forget that healing takes time; it’s important not to rush things but instead take small steps toward rebuilding trust and creating a stronger foundation for your relationship going forward.

Celebrate Your Progress And Successes

Now that you have taken the necessary steps to overcome your wife’s emotional affair, it is important to focus on celebrating your progress and successes. Celebration will help you maintain a positive outlook, boost self-confidence and provide motivation to continue moving forward.

To celebrate progress effectively, it’s vital to identify and acknowledge what has been achieved so far. You can do this by creating a list of accomplishments or milestones reached since the discovery of the emotional affair. This will enable you to see how far you have come and remind you that even small wins are significant in overcoming setbacks.

Moreover, remember that progress is not always linear; there may be moments when feelings of resentment or insecurity resurface. During these times, it’s crucial to remain patient with yourself while actively seeking ways to move past them.

Revisit goals set at the beginning of the healing process and evaluate how much closer you are towards achieving them.

Finally, take some time out of your day-to-day routine for celebration – indulge in an activity or hobby as a reward for staying committed to personal growth.

Celebrating success doesn’t mean forgetting about setbacks along the way but instead acknowledging achievements despite them. By doing so, you’ll find renewed strength and energy needed for continuing down the path towards recovery from your wife’s emotional affair.

Frequently Asked Questions

How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Still Emotionally Involved With The Person They Had An Affair With?

What are the signs of emotional involvement that can indicate whether your partner is still connected to the person with whom they had an affair?

Some common indicators may include frequent communication, secrecy or defensiveness about their interactions, and a preoccupation with thoughts or memories of the other person.

Coping mechanisms for dealing with emotional affairs involve honest communication, setting boundaries, seeking professional support if needed, and rebuilding trust over time.

It’s important to remember that every relationship is unique and what works for one couple might not work for another.

Ultimately, it will take time, effort, and commitment from both partners to heal from the hurt caused by an emotional affair.

Is It Possible To Rebuild Trust After An Emotional Affair, Or Should I End The Relationship?

Rebuilding trust after an emotional affair can be a challenging process for both partners involved.

Communication strategies are essential in this situation as it allows the couple to openly and honestly discuss their feelings, concerns, and expectations moving forward.

It is possible to rebuild trust if both partners are committed to working on the relationship and willing to put in the effort required.

However, it requires patience, understanding, forgiveness, and a willingness to let go of past hurt.

The key is for the partner who had the emotional affair to be transparent and take responsibility for their actions while the other partner needs time to heal and feel safe again in the relationship.

How Can I Cope With The Feelings Of Betrayal And Insecurity That Come With Discovering My Partner’s Emotional Affair?

Betrayal and insecurity are common emotions that arise from discovering a partner’s emotional affair. Coping with these feelings can be challenging, but there are ways to heal.

Seeking professional help is one option, as therapists can provide tools for processing and managing complex emotions. Additionally, finding healthy outlets for expressing oneself or engaging in self-care practices such as meditation, exercise, and journaling can also aid in the healing process.

It is important to acknowledge that recovering from an emotional affair takes time and effort from both partners involved. While it may not be easy, taking steps towards healing can lead to stronger relationships built on trust and mutual understanding.

Should I Confront The Person My Partner Had An Emotional Affair With, Or Is It Best To Just Move On?

When faced with the knowledge of a partner’s emotional affair, individuals may struggle with whether to confront the person their partner had the affair with or move on without addressing the issue.

The decision to confront or forgive is a personal one and depends on individual circumstances.

Some may find that confronting the other person provides closure and helps them move forward while others may feel it prolongs the pain and choose to focus on moving on instead.

Ultimately, holding onto anger and resentment can hinder healing and growth in relationships, making it important for individuals to prioritize their own well-being as they navigate through this difficult time.

How Can I Prevent My Partner From Having Another Emotional Affair In The Future?

In order to prevent future emotional affairs, couples must establish clear communication boundaries and prioritize rebuilding intimacy.

Metaphorically speaking, relationships are like plants that require constant care and attention in order to grow and flourish.

By setting aside dedicated time for open and honest conversations about each partner’s needs, desires, and concerns, couples can cultivate a deeper understanding of one another while also fostering empathy and trust.

Additionally, investing in activities that promote physical touch, such as massages or cuddling, can help rekindle feelings of closeness and affection.

Ultimately, preventing emotional affairs requires ongoing effort from both partners to nurture their relationship into something stronger and more resilient than before.


Discovering that one’s partner has had an emotional affair can be a devastating experience. Rebuilding trust after such betrayal requires open communication and commitment from both partners.

It is important to recognize the signs of continued emotional involvement with the other person and address them openly to prevent further damage. Coping with feelings of insecurity and betrayal may take time, but seeking support from loved ones or therapy can help in processing emotions.

Confronting the other person involved should only be done if it serves a constructive purpose rather than for revenge or retaliation. Moving forward, setting healthy boundaries and actively working on strengthening the relationship can prevent future emotional affairs.

In conclusion, healing from an emotional affair takes effort and willingness from both parties to rebuild trust and maintain long-lasting intimacy.

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